Category: Fear

Are You Uncomfortable Yet?

We live at a point in time where our daily life can be super uncomfortable.  Our security, our safety, and our level of comfort have been rocked.  We are being forced to live outside of our comfort zone and most of us don’t like it!  It’s one thing to make a choice to step outside of your comfort zone and make changes to your life, but it’s another to have those changes forced upon you.

None of us want to have decisions made for us.  We want to oversee our lives.  Living in a COVID-19 world, people are in pain.  People are dying.  People are drowning in debt.  People can’t pay their bills.  People don’t have food.  It can be challenging to see the positives and opportunities when we are just trying to survive.

For so many of us, right now is about surviving.  We’re trying to make it one day or pay one bill.  I know this can be hard to hear, but we might be missing what we need to learn.  COVID-19 is an opportunity for us to learn.  To make the hard decisions.

For years I lived in the dark.  I didn’t want to know what my problems were, I just wanted them to miraculously go away.  I didn’t care whether it was someone else coming to save me or my life just suddenly got better.  Either way was good.  I didn’t care how it happened.

Growing up I thought that certain things would happen at a certain point in my life.  For some they did, but for me, they didn’t seem to work out that way.  When I turned 30, I didn’t want to acknowledge that my life wasn’t what I had dreamed it would be.  The hardest question I ever asked myself was why.  Asking that question meant that I could no longer live my life in denial.  I had to take the leap out of my comfort zone.  That leap was one of the most terrifying things I had done.  Starting my own business last year was officially the most terrifying thing I have ever done.  Stepping out of your comfort zone is uncomfortable.

What you’re experiencing right now is a push out of your comfort zone and I’m right there with you.  I’ve been given another shove put of my comfort zone this past month.  My routine has been totally disrupted.  My income has been shaken up.  One of the hardest things that I had to do was overcome my pride and file for unemployment.  I had done everything right!  I had gotten a part-time job to help pay my bills while my business was getting established.  I stepped past my pride and had to have courage and trust that all would be ok.  The interesting thing is that by taking that leap I’m doing better than I was a month ago.

That doesn’t mean that everyone is.  I’m grateful that I’m doing better, but I also know that I’ve done a lot of work to get there.  There was no miracle cure.  No one came to save me.  It was me.  I had to do the work and take the leap.  My discomfort had to grow to the point that I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I had reached my breaking point.  Congratulations!  You may have just reached yours.  Here comes the opportunity for you to say that I’m never going to be like this again and start to make different decisions.

How are you going to step out of your comfort zone?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Have A Little Patience

How are you doing right now?  It’s ok if you’re having trouble adjusting.  We all are.  For most of us we go, go, go from waking to bedtime.  For most of us, we can’t do that anymore.  We may still have our jobs but are having to fit in schooling our children.  We may have lost our jobs and having trouble getting dressed.  You’re where you are right now and that’s ok.  Even when you can get dressed, you might have trouble doing something besides watching tv.  That’s ok too.  Be patient with yourself.

Things that we looked forward to are being canceled.  Even things that might have helped us to feel better like getting our hair or nails done aren’t an option.  It’s ok to be frustrated, depressed or angry.  It’s ok to be sad.  It’s ok to cry.  For us to start to feel better, you must release what you’re feeling, and it doesn’t happen overnight.  Honor where you are in the process.  If you feel like checking something off on your to-do list, then do it.  If you don’t, allow yourself permission to take a break.

We are being asked to heal.  The healing process for each person is different.  Each one of us is unique and so is our process.

Have patience with yourself.  Be kind to yourself.  I typically have a to-do list a mile long and over the last couple of weeks I haven’t done as much as I would have liked, but I like you, am having to figure out what my life is right now.  I miss my friends.  I miss my routine.  Things just aren’t the same.  I have watched videos on Facebook and movies and cried.  That’s not all that unusual for me, but it has helped.  I’m honoring where I am in the process.  I will get to the action phase soon, but for now, I’m adjusting and grieving for what was and determining what could be.

How have you been patient with yourself?  Or how do you need to be more patient with yourself? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

It’s Time for a Little Faith

One of my favorite quotes has always been “faith is believing in things when common sense tells you not to.”  A Miracle on 34th Street.  Sometimes we just have a feeling that everything is going to be ok.

We are living at a time when people around us are afraid.  You might even be one of them.  You may have lost your job or are about to lose it.  You might not be able to pay your bills.  You may know someone who is sick, or you may be.  You might just be frustrated that you can’t get everything done in a day.  First off, take a deep breath.  Everything happens for a reason.

For a long time, I had trouble with that statement, and I know I’m not alone.  Why does a young child get sick and die?  Why did this happen to me?  I wish I could answer all the why’s, but it isn’t always possible.  What I can tell you is that there is a lesson hidden in there and until you can find it, you must have a little faith.  Some of my biggest life lessons took me years to discover.  Some only took a few hours.

There is no right answer.  Every person lives life differently and you’re allowed to, but are you growing as a result or are you staying stuck?  If you’re stuck, it’s time to change that feeling and have a little faith that when we come out of quarantine that your life can be better.   Let’s be honest, life can’t be what it was before.  That may be hard to hear, but it’s true.  We can never be the people we were yesterday.  We have learned something or uncovered something which has moved us forward.  At the very least we are a day older.

On Tuesday I broke quarantine to go grocery shopping.  I started my day with a plan.  As soon as I put my key in the ignition my plan was gone.  I’ve spoken about my car battery before, well it decided it was done.  Why had it chosen that moment?  I looked to see who was open.  The least expensive option that I could see at the time was temporarily closed.  The only other place I could think of was the car dealership.  I called and they said they could replace the battery and it might still be covered under warranty.  I asked if he could look up when I purchased the battery.  I thought I had purchased it in 2016, but I had purchased it in October 2017.  It was still covered by the 30-month warranty.  I got a new battery for free!  I haven’t always had faith, but I had enough to get me there.  I had 1 month left on my warranty and if my battery hadn’t died, I will admit I would have tried to keep it going because I don’t have extra cash lying around.  But I also could have missed out on a free battery.  I was fortunate, but I was also going to another place and interacting with more people than I had planned.  As the day progressed, I started to think about how different things are from just a few weeks ago.  But I had to have faith that all would be ok.  I took all the precautions that I could and the rest I had to believe would work out.

We aren’t in quarantine just to keep us safe, but those around us safe.  To know that what we can contribute is enough and have faith that it is working.  Faith can help us in many things from getting a new car battery to walking through the grocery store to just working through our fear.  We just need to believe that everything will work out how it’s supposed to.  It’s time for a little faith.

What do you need faith to help you do?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

The Walking Wounded

This is a challenging time.  No one has ever seen anything like this, and we are unlikely to ever see anything like it again.  We are being asked to rise.  We are being asked to have compassion for our friends, our neighbors, our enemies, and ourselves.

It can be difficult when what we want isn’t going our way.  Our frustrations can be unleashed on those who have little to do with our problems.  This is a time to take a breath and think before we respond.

So many of us have lost our income.  We are having to file for unemployment and take steps that we never expected to take.  We did everything right.  Each one of us is the walking wounded.  We have so much in common right now, but it can be hard to see other people’s pain when we can barely see our own.

Last week was a challenge.  The place where I have been working part-time closed its doors until we are able to open again.  Last year I experienced all these major shifts and put the pieces together to have half of my plan blown apart again.  My first step was to make it through a day and then through the week.  It can be too hard to make decisions when you’re just trying to get through the day.

Once I made it through my work week, the next step was to take care of anything that I needed while on my way home.  Then I arrived home and cleaned up anything germs that I might have on me.  I washed the floors, the surfaces, and anything else I might have touched.  My final step was to give myself time.  I knew from experience that I could only take care of my most immediate needs at that moment.  I gave myself permission to feel anything I felt.  I listened to USA For Africa’s “We Are the World” and cried.  I worked through my pride and filed for unemployment so I could pay my bills.  I allowed myself to be angry at what this virus has done to the world, my plans, and to grieve for what I and others have lost. 

The world that we knew is not the same place and it can’t be.  When you do venture outside to get groceries or gas, say hello and thank the clerk.  Accept that the things you need might not be available.  Have compassion for those around you.  We are all in this together and are feeling the same things.  We will come out of this better people. 

After the attacks on September 11th one of the lessons I have always remembered was a sense of unity in our collective grief.  People hung their American flags at their door.  We have an opportunity again.  There is always a possibility of a rainbow after a rainstorm, but we must look for it.  Look for the silver lining.  We are resilient and will come through this stronger than ever.  We can do this but show a little kindness to each person.  It goes a long way.

How are you showing compassion? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

What Am I Going to Do?

It’s time to pause the posts of the Map of Consciousness for at least a week and focus on something that most everyone is feeling right now, anxiety and fear.

People like to be in control of their own lives.  They like to have an idea of what is going to happen from day to day.  They like certainty.

As we live in times of a pandemic, there is very little certainty or control.  New information is being reported throughout the day.  How are we supposed to keep calm?

While I believe that we make choices in our life, I also think that some things are fated.  I believe this may be one of those times.  For a long time, our culture has been all about me and what do I want.  You could see it in the grocery stores last week with people fighting for the last pack of toilet paper.  We aren’t meant to live our lives focused on only ourselves.  We are meant to be concerned for our neighbors and have compassion for our fellow citizens.  We are all hurting.

We are meant to shift right now.  Shifting isn’t comfortable.  Some of the anxiety you’re experiencing could be due to this.  Maybe you’re an empath and can feel other’s emotions.  Just going to the grocery store was an exercise in not picking up other’s emotions.  Or maybe you’re just trying to make it through the day with some sense of normalcy.

This is a time for us to come together, but your emotions will follow you wherever you go.  You can’t run.  You can’t hide.  It’s ok to be afraid or anxious, but you need to move through these emotions.  You don’t want them to become a part of you.  Negative emotions are said to weaken the body which can make you more likely to get sick.

So, what do you do?  You need to find what works for you.  It could be meditation, reading a book, going outside, or having a dance party.

My ability to quiet the mind started when I practiced regular Reiki sessions.  First by having other people conduct them for me and now practicing them on myself and others.  I also regularly turn off the TV.  I get the news that I need and then give myself time to process it.  In the evenings, I’ve been reading books.  I’ve been rereading books that I’ve loved over the years such as Harry Potter, Jane Austen and Twilight.  Books that can take me to another world and allow my imagination to soar.

What are you doing to help with your anxiety? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I Need to See the Truth!

Neutrality.  The 10th level of the Map of Consciousness according to Dr. David R. Hawkins.  Neutrality resonates at a level of 250 within the body.  This is where we’re able to be objective, impartial, and unbiased.  You can see the big picture and want to see the truth.

Our past wounds can hold each one of us back.  If we are acting from a place of our wounding instead of a place of neutrality, we can’t truly see the truth.  Our wounding tends to cloud our lens.  We see everything that happens through that lens, instead of seeing it for what it is.

There is a lot of fear circulating in the world today.  The slightest panic can cause the stock markets to plummet and for people to wonder what they’re going to do.  Unfortunately, we may be at a point in time where we’re being forced to grow.  We may have to make different decisions than we have previously made.  It isn’t easy to get to a place where you can see the big picture, but there is a calmness that can come over you with being able to make an informed decision.

Every decision that you make needs to be right for you.  So many of us live paycheck to paycheck but having to see things for what they really are isn’t easy.  For years, I would try to look at things positively.  If I could just find a positive spin on things would get better.  They might be better for a short period of time, but my bottom would eventually fall out again and it seemed like I was right back where I started.  It wasn’t until I started going through each step of the map that I made progress.  That doesn’t mean there weren’t situations where I had trouble looking at the truth.  One example was money.  Some of the basics I knew and couldn’t escape.  I knew I was in debt, but I wasn’t willing to look at the numbers.  I even knew most of the reasons why I had gotten in debt from wanting to learn new things to the rise of prescription drug costs to unexpected expenses.  But how to dig myself out of it.  Like you, I’m still a work in progress, and working myself out of my past ways, but I took a big step a few months ago and looked at where I was spending money and how much.  I cut out every program that I wasn’t using on a regular basis or cost more than I could afford, even if I loved it. I kept going until it was down to a place where I could pay my regular bills.  The process was painful, but I can now see the big picture.  I can see the truth.  I had spent years using material things to help me feel better about myself.  Let’s be honest, they didn’t.  The only thing that did was being honest with myself and seeing the truth.

What can you do to help you see the big picture?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I Wish…

Desire.  Up the map we go to level 6.  Dr. Hawkins found that Desire vibrates at a level of 125.  Desire is where you find jealousy, comparing, and longing.  You can hear yourself say I want more, and I deserve more.

How often have you said that I can’t keep living this way?  You notice how everyone else is living their life and wish that you could have that in your life.  It could be about anything that you want in your life from the seemingly mundane to the life altering.  What do you wish you had?

For so many years growing up, I just wanted to be like everyone else.  I didn’t want to be different.  I didn’t want to be singled out.  I wanted what everyone else wanted.  I would move up into Desire and then slip back into Fear.  I wanted to make a change in my life, but did I truly want it.  Not enough apparently because I would remain in the dream state, but why would I do that?  The next level up from Desire is Anger.  I didn’t want to be an angry person.  So, I would fluctuate between Fear and Desire.  I would hope and dream and then my fears would swallow me up.  I couldn’t take that step.  I couldn’t completely walk through that door.  I had a desire to be like everyone else, but I couldn’t quite do it.  In this case it might be because I wasn’t meant to be like everyone else.  I would do it for a while, but a true part of me would come in and the illusion would be dashed.  I was meant to be me and my path forward in this life may have similarities to yours, but it varies.

Other examples, love.  I have longed and dreamed since I was a little girl to be a wife and have children.  I’m still single and have no children.  My fears couldn’t quite overcome my desire, until recently.  I’ve been working on my personal blocks that have led me to turn down dates for no seemingly good reason other than the idea of how could that person possibly like me.  I had to get angry and move up before I could start to become empowered.  I might still be single, but I’ve finally started to become confident in who I am as person.  My desire finally started to push me forward.  My desire started to outweigh my fear.

What do you desire in your life?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I’m Afraid

Fear.  The 5th level of Dr. David Hawkins’ Map of Consciousness, which vibrates at a level of 100 within the body.  Most of us are aware of the feeling of I’m afraid, but how does it make you act?  It can make you feel anxious; Give you a racing brain; The inability to focus; And paralyze you.

Fear is an emotion that can controls us.  It prevents us from moving forward.  Whether it’s a fear that is conscious or unconscious.  Fear is a complex emotion that we may not even realize is controlling us.  Our fears can be used to manipulate us.  While we think it might be keeping us safe, it is preventing us from living and growing.

Fear is all around us.  Look at the world around us.  The things that we’ve been taught can end up being used against us.  The idea that we might not be right about something, that we have long believed to be true, can keep us from examining a new perspective or listening to a new opinion.  This is reflected everywhere right now.  People will only follow people on Facebook and Instagram that have the same beliefs.  They will follow a news outlet that portrays their political perspective.  We seem to live in a moment in time where even facts can be twisted into a lie or to fit an opinion.  How can that be?  People are fearful that if others knew the truth, they would be different, so only certain information is disclosed.  We’re at a turning point right now, you have the option examine something for what it is and make up your own mind.  You don’t have to let the collective fears control you.

Then there are individual fears.  For so many years, I would say that I was afraid of living.  I’d been hurt and I wanted to control situations, so they turned out how I wanted.  I wanted things to magically appear without having to put myself out there.  Do I still try to do this?  Unfortunately, yes.  I’m a human being, just like you.  I don’t want to be wrong, but the truth is, I don’t know everything.

My fears stopped me from moving forward.  They stopped me from leaving jobs, going on dates, or living an authentic life.  Oh, where to begin with my fears.  We live within a set range of emotions.  The top of my set was probably Fear for a long time.  I would go to bed at night and my mind would race.  I had severe anxiety and my mind would loop.  I didn’t know how to stop it.  People would give me suggestions and I didn’t feel capable of giving it a try.  I would say that I’m not ready or I’ll try later.  It could have been as simple as dancing with someone.  The problem was that I never became ready.  I didn’t try again later.  Fear had paralyzed me and my life.

The thing is that life around me didn’t stop.  I just didn’t participate in it.  I was stuck.  I felt detached from the world and myself.  I saw what seemed like everyone moving on in their life and I remained in the same place.  The things that I had dreamed of growing up seemed to allude me.  I missed so many opportunities became my fears held me back.

So how did I start moving forward?  At first it was exploring something new.  Opening my mind up to the possibility that maybe there was something I didn’t know.  That led me to participating in something new, which led me to becoming a part of something.  One day things were just different.  I had been moving through my fear without even realizing it.  Imagine what you could do, if you did realize you were moving through your fears.

Does that mean that my life became “perfect”?  No, but it was better.  There were so many things that I had discounted.  People that I had hurt and hadn’t even realized.  There were layers upon layers that I needed to examine.

The day that I was fired from my job was terrifying and freeing at the same time.  I hadn’t been without a job since I was 17.  I knew that I was moving in a less traditional direction, but I needed to have a way to earn an income.  What was I going to do?  I started out small.  I started looking for a job in another field, while also dreaming about what could be.  I started dreaming about a business that combined all the things that I had become interested in, but how did I do that?  I began asking questions and the answers were revealed.  I started putting together a business.  When my severance expired, I wasn’t where I had hoped to be, but I kept going.  I got a part-time job.  I cut out everything that I didn’t need or use on a regular basis.  I kept going.  Are things in my life perfect now?  No, but I’m so much happier today than I was just over a year ago.  I started to confront my fears and space started to open.  I still have fears that are being tackled, but they no longer hold me back from living.  By releasing fear, I started moving into Desire.

What fears are holding you back?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

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