It’s A Mistake!

I’m sure you’ve made a mistake.  The issue isn’t that you’ve made a mistake, but how have you dealt with it? Have you tried to fix the mistake, or do you just keep plowing ahead as though you haven’t made one? It could depend on the mistake.
 
This time of year, is perfect for trying to fix mistakes of the past or for forgiveness, whether it be to forgive yourself or others.  You may beat yourself up because you didn’t know something.  It’s ok that you didn’t know, the question is what do you do now that you know? 
 
There are things that you’ve learned that you had no way of knowing.  The past 18 months have been all about experiencing life in a way that you and no one else could have predicted. The life before March 2020 is gone and you can’t go back, but you can move forward and forgive for what you didn’t know.
 
Fear can stop you from living the life that you’ve dreamed.  The fear of being wrong can cause you to make mistakes. The idea that you might not be good enough to experience that dream is something that is real. After doing a lot of soul searching, you might start to feel differently. You wish that you’d known this information back before you made these choices.  You can choose again. I’m not talking about using a time machine, but you can do today what you didn’t do yesterday.  By starting to act differently, you can begin to change the mistakes of your past.
 
You do deserve to have the life that you’ve dreamed of.  You don’t have to carry the baggage of your past with you everywhere you go.  You can let it go. It doesn’t have to control you the way it always has.   This is a time for a new beginning.
 
What mistake do you want to let go of? Let me know. Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment. 

What’s Next?

Have you ever been so busy looking at the next step that you miss what’s in front of you?  You have your heart so set on a dream that you miss a different path right in front of you.
 
The past few months you’ve been triggered to examine the past, and the time for moving forward is finally here, but don’t get too far ahead of yourself.  There’s a tendency to look forward.  To figure out what you need to do next, and you miss the point.
 
Life is meant to be lived now.  Not in the past and not in the future, but now.  It’s a simple concept that’s often missed.  You’re not alone in that.
 
The present moment is the only place from which you can act.  That you can decide.  The present is where you live.
 
There’s no harm in dreaming, it’s encouraged, but don’t let the dream steal from the now.
 
There’s always work to be done, but it’s encouraged to take a time out.  Look at what you’ve accomplished.  Where you are right now.  Appreciate it.  Be grateful for what you’ve been given.  It can all change in the blink of an eye.  Things could shift for the better or the worse.
 
You want to know where you’re headed.  That you’re not wasting your time.  You can’t control how your life turns out.  You can manifest and dream and act, but there comes a point where you need to have a little faith and gratitude.  Life can be so much better than you’ve envisioned, but you have to allow it to be.  Sometimes the only way is to be in the moment.  Don’t be so committed to one path that you miss opportunities to get where you want.
 
How can you help yourself live in the now? Let me know. Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Between Worlds

Do you know what the future looks like?  If you do, aren’t you lucky!  If not, join the club.  You may have ideas.  You may have hopes and dreams, but it’s not certain until it lands in the present.
 
There are times where you so badly want something to happen, that you don’t live in the present moment.  You live for creating the future.  That perspective may eventually take you where you want to go, but it can also be emotionally draining.  You’re always seeking and searching rather than being able to accept life for what it is.
 
The same can be said if you’re a person that lives in the past.  You may believe the best days of your life are behind you.  You miss what was instead of what is.
 
Living in the present can be a challenge.  Especially for those who are trying to create a better you.  The trials of life are hard.  You so desperately want to be happy and there isn’t a lot of happiness in the world.
 
Last year the rug was pulled out from under you, and nothing is the same.  It’s not meant to.  You’re in the rebuilding stage.  You’re creating something new, and unfortunately, it doesn’t happen overnight.  You’re going to stumble, and you may even fail along the way.
 
Life’s journey is never easy and it’s the in-between areas of life where you learn the most about yourself and others.
 
For so much of life, the in-between areas are challenging and difficult, but there’s value.  Take the in-between area for what it is.  The area where a puzzle is started.  You start putting the pieces together and one day it will be completed.
 
For now, it may be messy and unknown, but there’s something there to be explored.  What in-between areas of life are you exploring?   Let me know. Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

What Is Normal?

According to Merriam-Webster, the word normal means “conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern; according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule or principle.” 

We use this word a lot during our everyday lives.  Especially right now.  People want their “normal” way of life.  People are creatures of habit.  We’re not particularly fond of change, unless it’s one of our choosing.  We want things our way.

Growing up I just wanted to be “normal”.  I wanted to be like everyone else.  I hated being different.  I hated that I had to go to occupational therapy and the other kids didn’t.  I spent my life trying to be like everyone else.  It took me 25 years to learn that wasn’t an option.  Every person is different.  There is no normal.   What if I said that especially applies to now?

You can have a normal day.  Even during a pandemic, we are establishing new patterns.  We have new habits, but we can’t go back to what it was.  It’s just not possible.  You can’t unlearn something.  We can’t redo yesterday, it’s in the past.  It’s the same thing with our normal.

Even going back to work, it’s different.  It’s not the same.  We can’t unhear what we’ve heard.  People are still afraid, and they have a right to be.  Even when the curve has started to decrease, people are going to be hesitant.  There’s a possibility of a new normal for each of us.  A new routine, but the old one’s gone.

It's strange how even living during a pandemic, a new normal emerges.  New habits. New routines.  New ways forward.  It’s ok to miss what was.  You can miss the simpler times, but things have changed.  Change happens and it’s meant to.  We’re meant to grow and evolve.  This is part of our evolution.  Let’s grow together!

How has your normal changed?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

The Truth Is . . .

The truth is there’s always a reason to not do something or to not say something.  There’s always a reason to not take action.  There’s always a reason to not make a change.

We can always come up with a reason why.  Not now.  Maybe later.  I don’t know enough.  I’m not ready.  What if they say no?

I would be willing to bet that one of these many reasons has held you back.  You’re not alone.  I’ve been right there with you.  I don’t have time, or I need more information are some of my go tos.

The truth is that it’s ok.  You can’t change the past, but you can change the present and maybe even the future.  One small step can change everything if you want.  Sometimes our biggest dreams can seem unattainable.  We just don’t know how to get there.  Breaking those dreams down into steps can make some dreams attainable.

I started my business by breaking it down into small steps.  Choose a name.  Design a logo.  Register with the State of Maine.

I passed my certification program to be an empowerment coach with small steps.  I signed up.  Completed Lesson 1.  Completed Lesson 30.  Completed Call 1.  Completed Call 30.  Reviewed notes and started completed final assignment questions for 1.  Repeat Day 5.  I reviewed and clicked submit.

It doesn’t mean that I knew everything as I was doing it or that I do now, but I did it anyway.  The moment of hitting submit was terrifying.  Those voices inside of you that say, what if.  What if I’m wrong?  What if I fail?

The truth is you don’t know if you don’t try.  I spent so much of my life not trying because of the what-ifs.  Who knows what kind of life I missed by not trying, but the truth is that I can’t change my past, but I can change what I do at this moment.

Who knows what the future holds for any one of us?  We may think we know, but one choice could potentially alter the course forward.  The truth is that anything’s possible, but we have to try.  We can’t live our life based on the what-ifs.  We must live for our dreams.  That might mean confronting our fears.  Overcoming our pride.  Who knows what you might uncover?  The truth is only you know.  What may have been true about you in the past doesn’t have to govern the remainder of your life.  The truth is yours!

What is your truth?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Just Do It!

Nike’s “Just Do It!” campaign can apply to so much more then just buying sneakers.  It can be a major lesson on life and taking action. 

Taking action can feel like one of the most terrifying things to do at times.  But what happens if we don’t?  There are so many possibilities.  We don’t allow ourselves to grow.  We self-sabotage.  In so many ways, we let life pass us bye.  FYI, it doesn’t really pass us bye. 

Sabotaging ourselves doesn’t feel like that in the moment.  We’re afraid to take that step.  We’re not sure.  What will life look like on the other side?  It could make you different from your friends and/or family.  Whatever it may be could be stopping you from stepping into something you’ve dreamed of.

I know we’re still amid a pandemic and we aren’t supposed to leave our homes.  But what I’m talking about doesn’t necessarily require you to leave your home.  There are still ways you can act.  Action doesn’t have to mean an accomplishment of a major goal but could be small steps towards reaching a major goal.

Over the course of the last year, I have taken small steps to big goals.  I have been working on my empowerment coaching certification.  One call at a time.  I’m almost done!  But as I reach the finish line, that fear can creep back in.  What does it mean once I’m finished?  I don’t know the answer to that yet.  But so that I accomplish this, I have set small goals to finish my written examination.  It is an exam of 40 questions, 20 about the course and 20 about 3 of my calls.   I said that I’m going to work on it an hour per day.  I looked back through my notes and started piecing together the responses to the first 20 questions.  Then I drafted my responses.  This part I’ve now completed.  Next, go back and listen to my 3 calls.  Listen to one call per day and draft my responses as I go.  I plan on submitting the exam on April 30.  Some days I haven’t done anything, and you know what?  That’s ok!  I’m making progress.  I started at the beginning of April.  I gave myself plenty of time with the expectation that I might not want to work on it some days.  I told people about my deadline to hold myself accountable.  You’re part of that team as I near the finish line!  I broke my goal into small manageable pieces.  These are the same steps I took when starting my business.  I’ve found this process works for me.  Maybe it doesn’t work for you.  That’s ok too!  It’s about finishing a way forward to something you might not have done.

You might have started but not finished.  I have a lot of those too!  Someday I will check them off and find a way to complete them.  But one thing at a time.  I can always go back and work on them.  First, pick a goal and work through the fears that are going to creep in.  They always do.  It’s how we know we’re on the right track.  Second, break it down into small steps.  Third, come up with a deadline.  Fourth, tell someone.  Fifth, just do it. 

What’s your goal?  How are your fears holding you back?  What can you do to move forward?   Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Are You Uncomfortable Yet?

We live at a point in time where our daily life can be super uncomfortable.  Our security, our safety, and our level of comfort have been rocked.  We are being forced to live outside of our comfort zone and most of us don’t like it!  It’s one thing to make a choice to step outside of your comfort zone and make changes to your life, but it’s another to have those changes forced upon you.

None of us want to have decisions made for us.  We want to oversee our lives.  Living in a COVID-19 world, people are in pain.  People are dying.  People are drowning in debt.  People can’t pay their bills.  People don’t have food.  It can be challenging to see the positives and opportunities when we are just trying to survive.

For so many of us, right now is about surviving.  We’re trying to make it one day or pay one bill.  I know this can be hard to hear, but we might be missing what we need to learn.  COVID-19 is an opportunity for us to learn.  To make the hard decisions.

For years I lived in the dark.  I didn’t want to know what my problems were, I just wanted them to miraculously go away.  I didn’t care whether it was someone else coming to save me or my life just suddenly got better.  Either way was good.  I didn’t care how it happened.

Growing up I thought that certain things would happen at a certain point in my life.  For some they did, but for me, they didn’t seem to work out that way.  When I turned 30, I didn’t want to acknowledge that my life wasn’t what I had dreamed it would be.  The hardest question I ever asked myself was why.  Asking that question meant that I could no longer live my life in denial.  I had to take the leap out of my comfort zone.  That leap was one of the most terrifying things I had done.  Starting my own business last year was officially the most terrifying thing I have ever done.  Stepping out of your comfort zone is uncomfortable.

What you’re experiencing right now is a push out of your comfort zone and I’m right there with you.  I’ve been given another shove put of my comfort zone this past month.  My routine has been totally disrupted.  My income has been shaken up.  One of the hardest things that I had to do was overcome my pride and file for unemployment.  I had done everything right!  I had gotten a part-time job to help pay my bills while my business was getting established.  I stepped past my pride and had to have courage and trust that all would be ok.  The interesting thing is that by taking that leap I’m doing better than I was a month ago.

That doesn’t mean that everyone is.  I’m grateful that I’m doing better, but I also know that I’ve done a lot of work to get there.  There was no miracle cure.  No one came to save me.  It was me.  I had to do the work and take the leap.  My discomfort had to grow to the point that I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I had reached my breaking point.  Congratulations!  You may have just reached yours.  Here comes the opportunity for you to say that I’m never going to be like this again and start to make different decisions.

How are you going to step out of your comfort zone?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Have A Little Patience

How are you doing right now?  It’s ok if you’re having trouble adjusting.  We all are.  For most of us we go, go, go from waking to bedtime.  For most of us, we can’t do that anymore.  We may still have our jobs but are having to fit in schooling our children.  We may have lost our jobs and having trouble getting dressed.  You’re where you are right now and that’s ok.  Even when you can get dressed, you might have trouble doing something besides watching tv.  That’s ok too.  Be patient with yourself.

Things that we looked forward to are being canceled.  Even things that might have helped us to feel better like getting our hair or nails done aren’t an option.  It’s ok to be frustrated, depressed or angry.  It’s ok to be sad.  It’s ok to cry.  For us to start to feel better, you must release what you’re feeling, and it doesn’t happen overnight.  Honor where you are in the process.  If you feel like checking something off on your to-do list, then do it.  If you don’t, allow yourself permission to take a break.

We are being asked to heal.  The healing process for each person is different.  Each one of us is unique and so is our process.

Have patience with yourself.  Be kind to yourself.  I typically have a to-do list a mile long and over the last couple of weeks I haven’t done as much as I would have liked, but I like you, am having to figure out what my life is right now.  I miss my friends.  I miss my routine.  Things just aren’t the same.  I have watched videos on Facebook and movies and cried.  That’s not all that unusual for me, but it has helped.  I’m honoring where I am in the process.  I will get to the action phase soon, but for now, I’m adjusting and grieving for what was and determining what could be.

How have you been patient with yourself?  Or how do you need to be more patient with yourself? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

It’s Time for a Little Faith

One of my favorite quotes has always been “faith is believing in things when common sense tells you not to.”  A Miracle on 34th Street.  Sometimes we just have a feeling that everything is going to be ok.

We are living at a time when people around us are afraid.  You might even be one of them.  You may have lost your job or are about to lose it.  You might not be able to pay your bills.  You may know someone who is sick, or you may be.  You might just be frustrated that you can’t get everything done in a day.  First off, take a deep breath.  Everything happens for a reason.

For a long time, I had trouble with that statement, and I know I’m not alone.  Why does a young child get sick and die?  Why did this happen to me?  I wish I could answer all the why’s, but it isn’t always possible.  What I can tell you is that there is a lesson hidden in there and until you can find it, you must have a little faith.  Some of my biggest life lessons took me years to discover.  Some only took a few hours.

There is no right answer.  Every person lives life differently and you’re allowed to, but are you growing as a result or are you staying stuck?  If you’re stuck, it’s time to change that feeling and have a little faith that when we come out of quarantine that your life can be better.   Let’s be honest, life can’t be what it was before.  That may be hard to hear, but it’s true.  We can never be the people we were yesterday.  We have learned something or uncovered something which has moved us forward.  At the very least we are a day older.

On Tuesday I broke quarantine to go grocery shopping.  I started my day with a plan.  As soon as I put my key in the ignition my plan was gone.  I’ve spoken about my car battery before, well it decided it was done.  Why had it chosen that moment?  I looked to see who was open.  The least expensive option that I could see at the time was temporarily closed.  The only other place I could think of was the car dealership.  I called and they said they could replace the battery and it might still be covered under warranty.  I asked if he could look up when I purchased the battery.  I thought I had purchased it in 2016, but I had purchased it in October 2017.  It was still covered by the 30-month warranty.  I got a new battery for free!  I haven’t always had faith, but I had enough to get me there.  I had 1 month left on my warranty and if my battery hadn’t died, I will admit I would have tried to keep it going because I don’t have extra cash lying around.  But I also could have missed out on a free battery.  I was fortunate, but I was also going to another place and interacting with more people than I had planned.  As the day progressed, I started to think about how different things are from just a few weeks ago.  But I had to have faith that all would be ok.  I took all the precautions that I could and the rest I had to believe would work out.

We aren’t in quarantine just to keep us safe, but those around us safe.  To know that what we can contribute is enough and have faith that it is working.  Faith can help us in many things from getting a new car battery to walking through the grocery store to just working through our fear.  We just need to believe that everything will work out how it’s supposed to.  It’s time for a little faith.

What do you need faith to help you do?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I’m Not Going to Take It Any Longer!

Anger. The 7th level of the Map of Consciousness according to Dr. David Hawkins, which resonates at a vibration of 150 within the body.  It’s the place where hostility and resistance reside.  You’re tired and you won’t accept this any longer.  The biggest advantage to this vibration is that for the first time you’re willing to stand up for yourself and realize that nobody is coming to save you.

When we are in the lower levels, we tend to want to people to accept us, so we’re willing to bend over backwards to accommodate their needs, while sacrificing our own.  For the first time, anger is where you realize that you matter, and you won’t take it anymore.

For so many years, I didn’t want to be angry.  I had seen anger and it typically ended with me being in tears.  I didn’t like it and I wanted to avoid the emotion at all costs.  I didn’t consider myself to be an angry person, but I wanted to be accepted.  I would allow people to walk all over me.  My feelings didn’t really matter.  I would find ways to stuff them down.  I had anger that I needed to release before I could move up to the next level of Pride. 

This past weekend Mercury went retrograde meaning that we’re being asked to review parts of our past.  The feeling of being taken advantage of started to come up.  Someone I know asked me to do them a favor.  I allowed myself permission to say no and stand firm in my decision.  I felt badly, but I needed to stand up for myself and stay committed to my plans.  A few days later I received another message asking the same question.  I’m being challenged.  Have I learned the lesson to stand up for myself and say no?  No one is going to save me and it’s time for me to save myself.  Is there anything in it for me?  No, in fact I end up losing more than I gain in this situation.  It’s ok to be nice and all, but the truth is that this is a pattern I’ve run in the past.  I’ve allowed people to not pay me back.  I’ve allowed people to take advantage of me.  I’ve allowed people to use me.  I don’t want that to be a part of my life anymore, so the answer is no.  So now I move up to Pride.

What are you angry about?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.