What Is Normal?

According to Merriam-Webster, the word normal means “conforming to a type, standard, or regular pattern; according with, constituting, or not deviating from a norm, rule or principle.” 

We use this word a lot during our everyday lives.  Especially right now.  People want their “normal” way of life.  People are creatures of habit.  We’re not particularly fond of change, unless it’s one of our choosing.  We want things our way.

Growing up I just wanted to be “normal”.  I wanted to be like everyone else.  I hated being different.  I hated that I had to go to occupational therapy and the other kids didn’t.  I spent my life trying to be like everyone else.  It took me 25 years to learn that wasn’t an option.  Every person is different.  There is no normal.   What if I said that especially applies to now?

You can have a normal day.  Even during a pandemic, we are establishing new patterns.  We have new habits, but we can’t go back to what it was.  It’s just not possible.  You can’t unlearn something.  We can’t redo yesterday, it’s in the past.  It’s the same thing with our normal.

Even going back to work, it’s different.  It’s not the same.  We can’t unhear what we’ve heard.  People are still afraid, and they have a right to be.  Even when the curve has started to decrease, people are going to be hesitant.  There’s a possibility of a new normal for each of us.  A new routine, but the old one’s gone.

It's strange how even living during a pandemic, a new normal emerges.  New habits. New routines.  New ways forward.  It’s ok to miss what was.  You can miss the simpler times, but things have changed.  Change happens and it’s meant to.  We’re meant to grow and evolve.  This is part of our evolution.  Let’s grow together!

How has your normal changed?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Who Has the Power?

Power is ultimately something that each one of us wants.  Not necessarily having total control over someone else, but the power to make decisions over our own life.

It’s hard when that option gets taken away.  We’re seeing people’s response all over the news.  There are protests.  People are fighting back.  Some of us are just doing what’s recommended.  So, what do you do?  First off, don’t lash out at other people.  They’re doing the best they can with the information they have.  It’s so easy to get angry and blame other people.  To be truly empowered, work to rise above these emotions.  Second, try to find a way so that you’re making a choice.  This can be challenging when you’re not able to cover your basic needs.  Is there a way that you can?  Can you do odd jobs for someone else?  Can you get assistance from the government?  Can you make changes to your lifestyle?  What can you do to make decisions that support you?  Third, how can you live within these new parameters?  Do you stay home?  Do you find other ways to occupy your time?  Do you get help?  Maybe even do things you really don’t want to, like wear a face mask.

Some emotion is coming to the surface for each one of us to deal with.  In the State of Maine, phases for reopening were announced this past week.  While a lot of them made sense, some of them did not.  Hair salons were on the phase 1 list.  For myself, my co-workers, and some of our clients this didn’t make sense.  Other clients are messaging us to book their appointments.  We must prepare for new requirements and find a way to feel comfortable leaving the safety of our homes and going back to work, especially when we thought we had more time.  This is a process.   There’s the physical side, with what needs to be done, but there’s also the emotional side.  It’s so important to not overlook the emotional component.  We aren’t robots.  People are afraid and there is little comfort provided on the news.  People feel alone and isolated.  We can’t even hold funerals and bury our dead in the same way.  We’re all grieving for a life that was lost, whether someone we loved or our “normal” life. 

Please give yourself and others time.  We will get there.  It may not happen as quickly as you would like and someday we won’t have to be concerned about COVID-19, but we aren’t there yet.  Until that day, try to find a way to make empowered choices and realize that everyone is hurting in some way, even if it doesn’t appear that way.  Looks can be deceiving.

How can you find a way to seize control and make a choice from a place of power?   Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment. 

Are You Uncomfortable Yet?

We live at a point in time where our daily life can be super uncomfortable.  Our security, our safety, and our level of comfort have been rocked.  We are being forced to live outside of our comfort zone and most of us don’t like it!  It’s one thing to make a choice to step outside of your comfort zone and make changes to your life, but it’s another to have those changes forced upon you.

None of us want to have decisions made for us.  We want to oversee our lives.  Living in a COVID-19 world, people are in pain.  People are dying.  People are drowning in debt.  People can’t pay their bills.  People don’t have food.  It can be challenging to see the positives and opportunities when we are just trying to survive.

For so many of us, right now is about surviving.  We’re trying to make it one day or pay one bill.  I know this can be hard to hear, but we might be missing what we need to learn.  COVID-19 is an opportunity for us to learn.  To make the hard decisions.

For years I lived in the dark.  I didn’t want to know what my problems were, I just wanted them to miraculously go away.  I didn’t care whether it was someone else coming to save me or my life just suddenly got better.  Either way was good.  I didn’t care how it happened.

Growing up I thought that certain things would happen at a certain point in my life.  For some they did, but for me, they didn’t seem to work out that way.  When I turned 30, I didn’t want to acknowledge that my life wasn’t what I had dreamed it would be.  The hardest question I ever asked myself was why.  Asking that question meant that I could no longer live my life in denial.  I had to take the leap out of my comfort zone.  That leap was one of the most terrifying things I had done.  Starting my own business last year was officially the most terrifying thing I have ever done.  Stepping out of your comfort zone is uncomfortable.

What you’re experiencing right now is a push out of your comfort zone and I’m right there with you.  I’ve been given another shove put of my comfort zone this past month.  My routine has been totally disrupted.  My income has been shaken up.  One of the hardest things that I had to do was overcome my pride and file for unemployment.  I had done everything right!  I had gotten a part-time job to help pay my bills while my business was getting established.  I stepped past my pride and had to have courage and trust that all would be ok.  The interesting thing is that by taking that leap I’m doing better than I was a month ago.

That doesn’t mean that everyone is.  I’m grateful that I’m doing better, but I also know that I’ve done a lot of work to get there.  There was no miracle cure.  No one came to save me.  It was me.  I had to do the work and take the leap.  My discomfort had to grow to the point that I just couldn’t take it anymore.  I had reached my breaking point.  Congratulations!  You may have just reached yours.  Here comes the opportunity for you to say that I’m never going to be like this again and start to make different decisions.

How are you going to step out of your comfort zone?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Have A Little Patience

How are you doing right now?  It’s ok if you’re having trouble adjusting.  We all are.  For most of us we go, go, go from waking to bedtime.  For most of us, we can’t do that anymore.  We may still have our jobs but are having to fit in schooling our children.  We may have lost our jobs and having trouble getting dressed.  You’re where you are right now and that’s ok.  Even when you can get dressed, you might have trouble doing something besides watching tv.  That’s ok too.  Be patient with yourself.

Things that we looked forward to are being canceled.  Even things that might have helped us to feel better like getting our hair or nails done aren’t an option.  It’s ok to be frustrated, depressed or angry.  It’s ok to be sad.  It’s ok to cry.  For us to start to feel better, you must release what you’re feeling, and it doesn’t happen overnight.  Honor where you are in the process.  If you feel like checking something off on your to-do list, then do it.  If you don’t, allow yourself permission to take a break.

We are being asked to heal.  The healing process for each person is different.  Each one of us is unique and so is our process.

Have patience with yourself.  Be kind to yourself.  I typically have a to-do list a mile long and over the last couple of weeks I haven’t done as much as I would have liked, but I like you, am having to figure out what my life is right now.  I miss my friends.  I miss my routine.  Things just aren’t the same.  I have watched videos on Facebook and movies and cried.  That’s not all that unusual for me, but it has helped.  I’m honoring where I am in the process.  I will get to the action phase soon, but for now, I’m adjusting and grieving for what was and determining what could be.

How have you been patient with yourself?  Or how do you need to be more patient with yourself? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

The Walking Wounded

This is a challenging time.  No one has ever seen anything like this, and we are unlikely to ever see anything like it again.  We are being asked to rise.  We are being asked to have compassion for our friends, our neighbors, our enemies, and ourselves.

It can be difficult when what we want isn’t going our way.  Our frustrations can be unleashed on those who have little to do with our problems.  This is a time to take a breath and think before we respond.

So many of us have lost our income.  We are having to file for unemployment and take steps that we never expected to take.  We did everything right.  Each one of us is the walking wounded.  We have so much in common right now, but it can be hard to see other people’s pain when we can barely see our own.

Last week was a challenge.  The place where I have been working part-time closed its doors until we are able to open again.  Last year I experienced all these major shifts and put the pieces together to have half of my plan blown apart again.  My first step was to make it through a day and then through the week.  It can be too hard to make decisions when you’re just trying to get through the day.

Once I made it through my work week, the next step was to take care of anything that I needed while on my way home.  Then I arrived home and cleaned up anything germs that I might have on me.  I washed the floors, the surfaces, and anything else I might have touched.  My final step was to give myself time.  I knew from experience that I could only take care of my most immediate needs at that moment.  I gave myself permission to feel anything I felt.  I listened to USA For Africa’s “We Are the World” and cried.  I worked through my pride and filed for unemployment so I could pay my bills.  I allowed myself to be angry at what this virus has done to the world, my plans, and to grieve for what I and others have lost. 

The world that we knew is not the same place and it can’t be.  When you do venture outside to get groceries or gas, say hello and thank the clerk.  Accept that the things you need might not be available.  Have compassion for those around you.  We are all in this together and are feeling the same things.  We will come out of this better people. 

After the attacks on September 11th one of the lessons I have always remembered was a sense of unity in our collective grief.  People hung their American flags at their door.  We have an opportunity again.  There is always a possibility of a rainbow after a rainstorm, but we must look for it.  Look for the silver lining.  We are resilient and will come through this stronger than ever.  We can do this but show a little kindness to each person.  It goes a long way.

How are you showing compassion? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

What Am I Going to Do?

It’s time to pause the posts of the Map of Consciousness for at least a week and focus on something that most everyone is feeling right now, anxiety and fear.

People like to be in control of their own lives.  They like to have an idea of what is going to happen from day to day.  They like certainty.

As we live in times of a pandemic, there is very little certainty or control.  New information is being reported throughout the day.  How are we supposed to keep calm?

While I believe that we make choices in our life, I also think that some things are fated.  I believe this may be one of those times.  For a long time, our culture has been all about me and what do I want.  You could see it in the grocery stores last week with people fighting for the last pack of toilet paper.  We aren’t meant to live our lives focused on only ourselves.  We are meant to be concerned for our neighbors and have compassion for our fellow citizens.  We are all hurting.

We are meant to shift right now.  Shifting isn’t comfortable.  Some of the anxiety you’re experiencing could be due to this.  Maybe you’re an empath and can feel other’s emotions.  Just going to the grocery store was an exercise in not picking up other’s emotions.  Or maybe you’re just trying to make it through the day with some sense of normalcy.

This is a time for us to come together, but your emotions will follow you wherever you go.  You can’t run.  You can’t hide.  It’s ok to be afraid or anxious, but you need to move through these emotions.  You don’t want them to become a part of you.  Negative emotions are said to weaken the body which can make you more likely to get sick.

So, what do you do?  You need to find what works for you.  It could be meditation, reading a book, going outside, or having a dance party.

My ability to quiet the mind started when I practiced regular Reiki sessions.  First by having other people conduct them for me and now practicing them on myself and others.  I also regularly turn off the TV.  I get the news that I need and then give myself time to process it.  In the evenings, I’ve been reading books.  I’ve been rereading books that I’ve loved over the years such as Harry Potter, Jane Austen and Twilight.  Books that can take me to another world and allow my imagination to soar.

What are you doing to help with your anxiety? Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Fantasy vs. Reality

For many of us a fantasy world can be a better world to reside in.  Reality can seem harsh at times.  It can be challenging to just move forward or get out of bed in the morning.  Reality can feel crushing at times and can lead to lots of tears.

A tower moment in my own life has been reached.  There are times when I prefer to live in the world of potential.  The land of yet to come, but that can be a distraction from looking at what is wrong in my life.  The energies of the past few days have made it impossible for me to live in a world of fantasy.  The reality of my life at this moment is a cocktail of disappointment and frustration.  2019 has been one of the most challenging years of my life.  I have travelled new paths and even though I know it is the right one, that doesn’t always make it easy.

My struggles are just as real as yours.  One moment I can be fine and the next a sobbing mess.  The slightest thing can set me off.  The unexpected can be a crash over a cliff.  There can be pain in knowing that something can’t happen yet.  This week I have been tested to practice what I preach.  After a few days of not being able to clearly see options, I reached out to a fellow coach to help with the reality of my life in this moment.

I’m optimistic because life can change for the better in an instant, but right now I’m taking my own advice and sitting with the pain.  About a year ago I received the warning of a bad review that my life was about to shift.  I started thinking and planning, but in reflection I’m still coming to terms with what that meant.  Things haven’t gone exactly as expected.  There have been challenges, struggles and lessons learned, but I must find my way forward.  I’m sure there will be more lessons as I progress, but I’m keeping my fingers crossed that one day soon joy will feature more prominently in my life.

Reality can feel harsh, but it is showing me a new way forward.  I must continue to grow and expand, just as you do.  Life isn’t perfect.  My life isn’t perfect and I’m sure that yours isn’t either.  The pain of reality can stop so many of us from pursuing our dreams.  I’m working on now allowing the reality of what my life looks like right now stop me from finding success on my new path, but my fantasy world still has its place.  It allows me to dream and ponder the possibilities.

What does your reality look like?  What do you want it to look like?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more about what I do?  Click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Moving On


Moving on to another phase of life can be challenging.  It may mean giving up a long help dream or a hope for things to come.  There is also a transition period between the old life and the new life that can seem uncomfortable.  There is concern about things not working out the way you want them to, but you know what?  Sometimes you must take the leap.

I have dreams that I still feel like I should fight for, and others I know I need to move on from.  My business feels like one that I’m still fighting for.  I’m starting to see small shifts happen, and I celebrate each victory.  My personal life has more of a gray area coloring it.  There are times that I feel I should be ready to step into a new chapter and others where I slide back into the past.  There are still wounds I need to move on from and release.  Each day I let go of another piece.  2019 has been a huge transitional year.  I had to move from a career path that had defined me from more than 10 years.  I had to step into who I am called to be.  I had to rethink my dreams and release what no longer serves me.

But all the letting go and moving on have brought new adventures.  I am doing something for a living that I enjoy and doesn’t feel like work.  I am at a part-time job where I can be myself and be appreciated.  We recently had a staff meeting and I had the opportunity to hear what my co-workers (and now friends) thought of me.  I was blown away by the comments.  As a society we gravitate more towards the negative side of life instead of the positive.  Sometimes it is easier to hear the negative.  We rarely have the chance to hear what people love about us.  We typically express what drives us crazy about someone that we know.

I had to release my story this year as to why would people like me for me.  If I hadn’t been working on releasing that story and moving to a new way of thinking, I couldn’t have been in the space to hear that I am appreciated for being me.  It wasn’t easy to get to this spot.  It has involved a lot of work and tears, but I am moving into the next phase of my life with anticipation.

I could have wallowed and thrown myself a long-term pity party after being let go from my job in January, but there were other plans for me, and I knew it.  I was living small.  I put everyone else’s needs before my own.  I was trying to be who everyone else needed instead of who I truly was.  The “real” Sarah would emerge on occasion, but most of the time she was in hiding.  She wasn’t allowed to come out, it wasn’t safe.

That story had to go before I could step into my new life.  The path is still coming into focus for me.  We all have something glorious waiting for us, but we need to move on from the old and release it.  What story do you need to release?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Where am I?

Have you ever felt lost?  I would be surprised if you haven’t.  Everyone has felt lost at one time or another.  A time where I don’t quite know what’s wrong, but how did I end up here?  Life is a series of choices that are made and sometimes can take us so far from what was intended.  Those choices are trying to show us something, but we must be willing to pay attention.  It is challenging to try and look at things from a new perspective and see that maybe we had a hand in where we have ended up.  It is hard to admit that maybe you have been wrong.  That maybe you couldn’t see something that was right in front of you.

I first began my journey towards the spiritual side of life when I went to the Enlightenment Expo in Portland, Maine in May of 2013.  It had been suggested that I go, and I figured why not, I didn’t have other plans that day and I really could use a new direction.  I was at a job where I wasn’t happy, I didn’t have a romantic partner in my life, and nothing seemed to be going the way that I wanted.  I started to look for answers.  I started going to events and opened myself up to new ideas.  I had a numerology reading at one of them where she told me that I could be working at one sometime.  My response was, “yeah right”.  I had that conversation with two additional psychics over the years before I finally started to hear what I was being told.  Synchronicity began to flow.  I met the people I needed to meet so that I could learn to open up.  Spirit has a way of directing you even if we don’t want to hear it.

What aren’t you seeing or hearing?  Do you feel lost right now? Is there something right in front you that you can’t see?