Judgment Day

Judgment.  A feeling that can bring some people to their knees.  A perception that can be unnecessary if people take the time to think before they act.

Each one of us perceives the world through our own lens.  Six people can be having a conversation and each person can walk away with a different understanding.  It doesn’t make it right or wrong, just different. 

I have tried to look at conversations differently since learning about personal lenses.  I used to jump to conclusions and stew.   If I could work up the courage, I might ask questions, but I wanted to make other people happy.  Which meant that I was miserable.  But I also knew that I couldn’t go around accusing people based on my perceptions.  My perceptions aren’t always correct.  Have you ever sat at a table and heard a piece of a conversation and made an assumption?  If you can work up the courage to ask, 9 times out of 10 you were wrong about the conclusion you made.  You know what they say about assumptions. It makes an ass out of you and me.

In a moment you make a judgment about a conversation or someone else.  This summer a friend’s assumption and judgment ended a friendship.  I responded to her accusations by taking some deep breathes and debating my response.  I decided I would ask for clarification and asked some questions.  I was unsuccessful in my attempt.  She had decided that I had taken advantage of her.  End of discussion.  End of friendship.  Most situations aren’t cut and dry.  If you’re willing to take the time and reflect, you may be able to see things from a new perspective.  You can also talk it through with a neutral party, but you should never just react.  Reactions lead to hurt feelings and tends to escalate quite quickly.  Temporarily walk away before you respond.  Sleep on it if you need to.  You should speak from a neutral place and not an emotional one.  When people react, it typically comes from a place of unsettled emotions and past wounding.

Judgment triggers provide you with an opportunity to explore and question your own reactions.  These reactions are yours and yours alone.  You don’t need to force those upon others, but you do need to release them.  Do you have ideas on how to release them?  Let me know.  Let’s release your judgments, perceptions, and triggers.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment. 

Enough!

When do you raise up your hands and say enough?  I give up!  Well that depends on two things: do you need to surrender to the will of the universe or is it time to give up?  The answer requires that you tap into yourself.  Only you can answer that question.  That is what makes this question so challenging.

So what do you do?  I can’t answer for you, but I ask myself the question, do I want this?  It may bring up fear.  Is it a good fear or an exciting fear?  It may feel like dread.  That is when I know that it’s time to do something different, but that doesn’t mean that it’s easy.  It can take a while to wrap your head around how to proceed.

If I’m honest with my myself, I knew that it was time to leave my job before I was forced to leave in January.  My heart was no longer invested, but I needed time to decide on my steps.  I thought I had time to figure that out, but in my case the clock was ticking.  I had to figure out my next steps afterwards, but one thing was certain, that part of my life was over and it felt right.  Nine months later I don’t regret my decision to go in a new direction.  My new direction is hard and challenging, but it is exciting.  I know deep in my heart that it is the right decision.  Now I need to surrender to the timing and will of the universe.  This past week signs that the energy is moving in a new direction have started to show up.  People are asking about my new business.  It has been almost five months since I launched my business.  I had to demonstrate my commitment to what I know is right, and that I made the right decision in moving my life in a new direction.  Someday soon I will wake up and begin to see the results of my commitment.  The timing isn’t right yet.

I apply this same practice to making decisions about other matters, including my personal life.  Those have been more challenging.  The challenging part of the process is that we can want something so badly it can be hard to see straight.  Something can feel absolutely and totally right, but the timing isn’t.  We can have an idea of the course we will chart, but we must surrender to the outcome.  Surrendering is hard and it is a process that sometimes you will need to do over and over again.  I find that that every time I go through the process tears are involved.  There is an emotional component and limiting beliefs that need to be faced.  These are the actions that I’m taking to show my commitment to being a more empowered person.  The universe responds to action and commitment.

What decisions are you making now?  What is your process for deciding when it is time to give up or surrender?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I’m Quite Bendy

Are you flexible?  Being flexible is something I’m working on.  We can be shown something, or know something is right deep within our gut, but it doesn’t always happen the way we expect.

It is ok to go back to the drawing board.  I do it every day.  It doesn’t mean you’re wrong, but that something else might be in play.  It could be divine timing is off.  It could be the energies aren’t right.  You may need to work on releasing energy from your system to welcome in the new.

The energies of July were intense.  Between the eclipses and all the retrograde planets, it seems like things have been on hold.  Things that we anticipated moving and advancing, stopped and dug in.

I spent the month of July cleaning up my emotional body and when I thought I was close to being ready to move forward, Mercury moved direct on July 31 and the eclipse energies officially closed with the new moon the same day.  The universe had a surprise for me.  When I first started planning my business, I had anticipated having a part-time job.  One seemed to line itself up, but it fell through, Mercury Retrograde was in action then too.  I took it as a message, and verified it through multiple tools (oracle cards, pendulums, other readers, etc.).   The universe was telling me I didn’t need the part-time job, so I put the idea on hold.  Three months later though, things haven’t turned out the way I thought, and Mercury Retrograde was back.  I put on my “asking for help” cap.  The part-time position that had fallen through in April was back open, so I reached out and inquired about the position.  Within a short period of time, I had an appointment to talk about the position, and now have a part-time position.

But here’s the thing. I have always needed to have a sense of control.  I have three planets in the fixed sign of Scorpio (Sun, Mercury, and Uranus).  I’m currently being pushed by spirit to go with the flow.  I’m learning to loosen the reins and go where the universe wants me to go.  It is one of the hardest things I’ve done, but there are moments where it feels right, and I know it is the correct decision and part of my life path.  For me it is finding the balance between flexibility and control.

How are you doing with the dance between flexibility and control?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I Don’t Need Your Help!

As a society we are taught that you should be able to do it all yourself.  If you can’t do it yourself, then you are a failure.  But here’s the thing, none of us can do it all ourselves. 

Everyone needs help every now and then, sometimes even more than we realize. What is wrong with us asking for help?  It goes against everything that we are taught.  We are taught that we should be self-sufficient.  We should be able to do it all, especially as women.  We are taught that we can have a full-time job and a family without help from anyone.  That isn’t true.  We all need to be supported, especially when we are making drastic changes.

Most of my life I have felt that it was unacceptable to ask for help.  I needed to be able to take care of it all myself in order to be successful.  All of life’s answers could be found in a book, or if you tapped way down inside yourself, you could find the answer.  While that may be true to a certain extent, I also found that everyone experiences life through a different lens, and that alternative lens can be extremely useful in helping you to move forward.  It may be that you work with a teacher who can help you to learn a new skill that will take you to new places.  It could be working with a coach or therapist to guide you on your journey through these dark places to a place where the world seems lighter.  I have tried both approaches and you know what?  I was able to move quicker when I asked for help.  Whether it was a teacher or a coach, they were able to see things from a perspective that no matter how hard I tried I wasn’t in that place.  It also provided me with someone that I was accountable to.  I had to demonstrate to someone that I had done the work.  I couldn’t keep kicking the can down the road because something more important came up.  I was truly able to work on myself in a more efficient manner.

We are all a work in progress.  There is never going to be a moment where you are “cured”, but there is a moment that you accept your humanness and no longer let those fears hold you back.  You can ask for help and know that you are doing the best you can.  And you know what?  Everything will be ok.  The world isn’t going to cave in on you because you can’t do everything that you would like.  You can only do what is important to you. 

Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.  How can I help you to make a change?

Shadows and Dreams


Happy Independence Day weekend here in the United States!  It seems like there has been a lot going on in the physical world and the energetic world.  Plus, here in Maine it finally started to feel like summer.

We are amid the eclipse portal.  The second eclipse is on July 16.  Everything is energetically heightened right now.  I don’t know about you, but all my shadow triggers are rising to the surface.  I have had to spend time energetically cutting cords to my past and releasing my fears.

We are halfway though the year.  It is time for a midpoint review.  It is an opportunity to look at things with a new perspective.  Where are you in relation to you dreams?  As I have previously mentioned, my year began with a bang.  The structure that I have spent the last 15 years building detonated around me.  It came crashing to the ground with a giant thud.  I lost my job and spent several days thinking about my next chapter.  What did I want to be in my new beginning?  I had a clean slate.  I could do anything I wanted.  I spent some time looking at new careers, but nothing sparked my interest, like a Facebook Live featuring Colette Baron-Reid and Crystal Andrus Morrisette.  I had also been taking classes to raise my consciousness with Marisa Moris over the last year.  I soon decided there was never going to be a better time to chase a new dream.  I got my Reiki Master training with Elemental Energies with Chris Ann & Jeff and laid the groundwork.  I set up a new business.  I built my website and on April 30, I officially launched my business.  It hasn’t been easy, and I am clearing triggers constantly, but when I’m doing sessions with people it doesn’t feel like work.  I am on my path,

What has been coming to the surface for you?  What are your dreams?  Are you living them?  Let me help you to create your dream life.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.  How can I help you to claim your dreams?

Ooh! Look what’s on TV!

Do you ever get distracted?  We all do.  It is human nature.  You may have the best of intentions when you start, then something intervenes, and you never get back to it.  It is easier to camp out in front of the tv eating popcorn than it is to change something about your life.

I spent years avoiding change and I do mean years.  As a teenager I lost my ability to trust other people after being harassed and betrayed by a friend.  I didn’t want to put myself back out there and get hurt again so I hid.  My preferred method of hiding was vicarious living watching soap operas.  Both teen soap operas and adult ones.  I recorded Days of our Lives and General Hospital for years before the tapes fell to the floor one day to show me, I needed to move on.  Marlena was possessed by the devil.  Ooh!  That’s better than focusing on what’s wrong with my life.  I didn’t want to face what was going wrong in my life.  That I couldn’t trust people is hard for a 13-year-old to go through.  So, what did I do?  Nothing.  I figured that it would all work itself out.  You know what though, it didn’t.  I turned 30 and I still had the same trust issues as I did when I was 13. My preferred distraction methods of hiding and watching TV had longevity.

Denial is a psychological defense mechanism that can be used to protect, but it can only take you so far.  Denials and distractions don’t help to change your life.  They keep you stuck.  When I turned 30, I realized that no one was coming to save me.  I had to learn to save myself, but it took me a long time to find out how.  I tried taking courses or reading books, then I would get overwhelmed, so I would hide and distract myself by watching tv.  It is easier to stay in that place of denial than it is to make changes.

What do you want to do differently?  Is it time to make a change, but you are afraid?  Or do you know that you can’t do it alone?  I am here to help.  Let me know how I can help you.