Category: New Direction

Celebrate Life

We have a lot to learn in this world but specifically about death.  We have a hard time letting people go.  And then there is the mourning and grief process.  For some people they’re able to move forward, and for others they dwell in their grief for years.

My first exposure to death was when I was 17.  People in my family had died over the years, but I didn’t really know them.  This was the first time I knew the person.  I was close with my Papa Paul.  I couldn’t imagine what my life would be like without him, but at the end of his life he wasn’t truly able to live.  He could no longer read and had trouble taking tape off a present.  We had his funeral during the Ice Storm of 1998.  There was no electricity at our house or the funeral home.  The minister needed a flashlight to read his notes.  My first experience with the grieving process was unique, but I have come to realize that the process of funerals and memorial services are as the unique as the person themselves.  I watched my grandmother during the funeral.  She had lost her husband of 57 years and the word that has always come to mind is stoic.  I never saw her cry.  She soldiered on.  I learned that you soldier on.

My most recent experience with death happened only a few weeks ago.  My Aunt Louise was 96 years old and had been in and out of the hospital.  Her family asked for prayers.  I prayed that if it was in her highest and best good for her to stay that she stay, if it wasn’t for her to have a peaceful transition to the other side.  She was with us only a few more days.  She was like another grandmother to me growing up.  She had always been there.  She was there to guide us and support us as she had so many others.  But it was her time to go.  I posted a message on Facebook in tribute to her.  I received a multitude of condolence messages.  I knew that she was in a better place.  Aunt Louise was a person that deserved to be recognized in death with praise that she didn’t need in life.  As we have done many times over the years, we gathered.  When most of your relatives pass in their 80s and 90s, you learn to celebrate their lives.  We told stories and laughed.  There were some tears, but she wouldn’t have wanted us to be sad.  She had accomplished everything that she had set out to do.  She was welcomed to the other side by a pack of dogs and the family members that had passed before her.  Her journey was complete.

Death is an opportunity to pause and reflect.  What do you admire?  Where are you off your life path?  I cannot speak to the death of a spouse or child because that isn’t something that I have experienced.  Longevity runs in my family.  I am one of the fortunate ones.  I have had the privilege of getting to know all four of my grandparents and their siblings.  I got to know who they were and while I miss their physical existence, I know they are around me.  I still have my own journey to pursue.

Death is one of the few certainties of life.  We have an opportunity to view things differently.  We can still communicate with our loved ones, but we may need a translator.  They communicate with us in our everyday lives.  During my aunt’s reception, the lights flickered.  Her and our extended family was with us in spirit.  They are still part of our journey but are no longer part of our physical world.

How do you view death?  Do you celebrate their legacy?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

The Time For Happiness Is Now

Are you happy?  For most people the answer is no.  You may he happy in an area of your life, but overall the answer is no.  The decisions that you’ve made in your life have led you to this point.  The decisions can be due to believing it’s the right decision or being afraid to make a different one.

Fear of the unknown is a reason that people remain stuck in their lives.  The known even if it causes discomfort is better than the path not yet taken.  But the planetary energies are pushing us on to this new path.  What might have felt right at one time has lost its appeal, or is becoming more difficult to maintain.  Spirit will keep triggering us until we make the change.

Most of my life I didn’t like change.  Dread might be a better word.  For me, change seemed to involve the people I loved dying and dreams not turning out as I expected.  Even when I stepped on the spiritual path taking the leap on to the unknown was difficult.  Even having multiple psychics tell me I could do this took a while to comprehend.  I had already started down a path that I desperately wanted to work.  I would work harder and keep trying.  It had to work.  The problem was while that concept worked for some people, it didn’t for me.  The reason it wasn’t my path.  It was a lesson that I needed to learn as I walked my path.  Taking the leap on to my path was terrifying and challenging, but with a bit of excitement.  I needed a push on to it or maybe a shove.  Without it, I might still be working on the lesson.  We all have our reasons for staying put, but we are sent to this world for a reason.  We can make a difference if we have the courage to be our authentic selves and not who we think we should be.

So how did I overcome the fear to change?  I started to work through it.  I worked on the beliefs that I had learned over the years.  I cast away the story that I told myself about why I was unhappy and started to write a new one.  The fear to change is still there, but it has been muted.  It reactivates the next time I make an uncomfortable change, but it has lessened. 

As of this moment, I’m not where I believe I’m meant to be.  But I’m happier now working multiple jobs, putting the pieces together, and trying to figure out what my gifts are, and how to incorporate those into my new business, than I was playing it safe and following the path I thought I was meant to follow.

When it comes down to it we have so little time on this planet called Earth.  We have hopes and dreams, but are afraid to start following them until we feel safe and secure.  Then and only do we feel it’s possible to do what we love.  What if I told you there is another way?  It may mean having multiple jobs, like me, but the time to act is now.  Only by walking through the fear can you begin to feel happy in your life.  Act.  It may be something small or jumping off the cliff, but either one will start the process of catapulting you into a new life.  Take the leap.  Do you need help?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Time Out!

Sometimes before we can reach our destination, we need to take time off for ourselves.  We need to rest our bodies.  If we don’t listen, spirit will send signs and synchronicities to get our attention.  If you still don’t listen, it can send illnesses or ailments.

We can’t always go, go, go.  Sometimes we must take a time out.  With starting my own business, there are days where I go, go, go and don’t stop until I climb into bed.  There are other days where I feel like I must force myself to accomplish anything and that is ok.  It is all part of my process.

This past week has been all go, go, go.  I took some time on Sunday for me, but apparently it wasn’t enough because the universe sent me nausea.  Plus, I went for my monthly appointment with my chiropractor and my body was completely out of alignment.

I needed to take time to think and provide myself with clarity.  What specifically do I want?  Who do I want to be?  With that information I can begin the manifestation process.  I must be specific with what I want though.  I took some time to state specific goals for my business and personal life.  I can now begin releasing my anticipated outcome.  But I need to take small action steps to show that I am willing to move in that direction.  One of my goals is to start incorporating more of me into my social media.  I have been practicing for several months by recording myself, but no one has seen them yet.  It is time for me to be seen.  I had been getting the message on my daily walks, but haven’t done anything with the message.  So, the universe sent me a time out to ponder and reflect.  Now I need to work through the fear of showing my videos for others to see.  The only way to move past fear is through it.

Do you need to rest and relax?  Do you need clarity regarding an area of your life?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Car Problems Again!

What do car problems have to do with spirituality?  Well, let me fill you in.  Everything happening around you is a sign from the universe or an indicator of what is happening in your internal world.  If you can decipher the message, the sign can help you move forward.

What do I mean?   In 2013 I was just beginning to become interested in the spiritual world.  I had purchased a Subaru Impreza in 2010 and had never had any issues, but suddenly there was this loud clunking noise every time I turned my wheel.  My car was brand new and shouldn’t be making that noise.  I met a friend for lunch, and we went to a small metaphysical event that I heard about through my sister.  Her sister-in-law was there giving readings.  I had met her several times over the years, but she didn’t know much about me.  I had my first reading. She asked me if I had been having problems with my car.  I’m listening.  Your grandfather is trying to get your attention.  You’re not listening to him.  She delivered his message.  I went to my car and drove home.  I realized the sound my car was making had gone away.   I could have spent a fortune on trying to figure out a problem that didn’t really exist, but was energy trying to deliver me a message.

Fast forward 3 years, I knew that I was going to need new tires, but according to the Subaru garage, I should have about 6 months left.  Not even a week later, I am driving home from work and my tire goes flat.  AAA comes and puts on my spare tire and off I go.  The next day I put four new tires on my car.  Another week goes by, I go to the Enlightenment Expo in Portland and walk out to my car at the end of the night.  My rear driver’s side tire is flat.  How can that be?  I have 4 brand new tires.  AAA comes again and puts my spare tire on.  I had gotten a nail in my tire.  I went back to where I had gotten the new tires, they fixed me up and off I went.  That was in 2016.  Every year since then I have had low tire pressure indicators at least twice a year.  I had one in June this year, and one this past weekend.  Both were on my passenger rear tire.  Each of these events has been trying to tell me something.  I have had the tire examined each time as well. 

In the first instance, the message from my Papa was that I needed to move forward in a new direction.  In the second, I had punctured my tires.  I was in the process of changing my life, but some obstacles and delays were being presented.  I needed to look at these obstacles from a new perspective.  The third, I had slow leaks.  I was taking my energy in directions that weren’t necessarily serving me.  I needed to make some small tweaks and focus on my dreams.  It was a time to re-examine what I’m doing.  I needed to gain clarity about my life, and what I’m manifesting.  I’m in this process now.  Trying to be clear about what I want. 

What signs is the universe sending you?  Have you experience anything like flat tires on a continuous basis?  What do you think it means?  Let me know.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Let Go of the Past and Step into a New Life

When you first start out on the spiritual path, you are taught that if you are grateful and positive you will start a new life.  While part of that is true, there is one problem.  You are a human being.  That human being has memories and emotions stored within the body.  In order to be truly grateful and to manifest a life that is for highest and best good, you must go backwards.

You have a story.  It is a story that is repeated.  It can be a story that you tell yourself, or one that you see appear in front of you.  But that story is what is holding you back.  To get where we want in life, we must first confront our story.

For years I did the positivity thing and would state affirmations.  While they changed my outlook on life, they didn’t change the outcome of my life.  I still wore a mask.  I wasn’t myself.  I had the story on repeat in my head.  I would look at other people and compare how my life was and the perception that I had of them.  I didn’t measure up and there was a why even try type of attitude.

In January I signed up for a coaching certification program and started working on the course work.  As I listened to coaching call after coaching call, I had an epiphany.  Each woman that I listened to sounded like me.  There were slight variations in their story, but they were each relatable.  I could always find something in common with them.  Like me, some of them tried to hide the problems with their life, but their problems would follow them.  They would leave one job and the problem would follow them to a new job.  They would leave one relationship to have some of the same issues present themselves in the next relationship.  Their problems didn’t just disappear, they presented in a new form.   In order to truly move forward and live an empowered life you must examine your past.  Whether it is the past in this lifetime or another lifetime.  It will follow you until you release what is stored in your body.  The body doesn’t lie. 

Take a moment and think about the reasons that you have left jobs or relationships.  Do they have a common theme?  These themes are trying to provide us clues.  Once we start to examine the clues, we truly start to create the change that we are searching for.  Let’s release that story that no longer serves you and who you are meant to be.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

Presence is Now

Living in the present moment should be easy, right?  I won’t speak for you, but for me it has always been a challenge.  I tend to dwell about the past, and look to what I want to happen, or be different in the future, instead of living in the moment. 

Why do I do that?  I haven’t quite figured out yet, except it is a problem that most people have, and I’m sure that you have experienced yourself.  We tend to not experience life from the present moment.   You want to know the answer before you have experienced the question.  You read a book, and you want to flip to the end to find out the ending.  But the key to making real change in your life is to live in the moment.

I have a good memory, which I have said to multiple people can be both a blessing and a curse.  One of the few times that my memory fails me is when I have a seizure.  To give further background of my seizure disorder, I saw a neurologist when I was a child.  In last week’s post, I went into some details about how my seizure disorder effected me as a child, now for the adult side.  My neurologist had said that my seizure disorder would probably return as an adult, but he couldn’t state in what form.  Seizures tend in be cyclical and hormonally based, so there are different onset periods.  I missed the one when I hit puberty, but I hit the one as I was moving into my 20’s.  As a child, I had grand mal seizures.  These are the types of seizures that everyone thinks of when they think of seizures.  As an adult, I was diagnosed with absence seizures.  I would space out for a few moments, and then my consciousness would return.  Looking back now, I can’t say for certain that being presented with those circumstances at that time that I would do anything different with them.  But what do I do next?  I went to a new neurologist.  Of course, what is next?  Tests.  I had to have an EEG where they make you stay up all night and then tape suction cups to your head.  They want you to fall asleep without moving and sitting up in a chair.  I don’t know about you, but I’m not the type of person that can sleep on command.  I’ve had this test a couple of times, and it has come to the point where they give me something to help me fall asleep.  I still can’t sleep during the test, but at least I’m somewhat relaxed.  During one test I still hadn’t fallen asleep several hours after the test was complete.  I guess sleep medication and I aren’t compatible.

The second test that they ordered was an MRI.  They wanted to make sure that there was nothing structurally wrong with my brain.  I went to have the MRI and the technician said that it would take an hour and a half, but if I moved during the test it would blur the images, and I might have to come back.  No way was I going to do that again.  The technician taped my head down to the table so that I could feel if I moved too much.  Luckily, I have only had to do this test once.   The neurologist said there was nothing structurally wrong with my brain and that it was normal.  My boss at the time said that couldn’t possibly be true and I should have a second opinion.  Funny guy.  So, I received my diagnosis and they put me on medication.  The medication would help my mind to not wander, but the medication presented a new obstacle.  If I forgot to take it, I could have a grand mal seizure.  This has happened to be a couple of times over the years. 

So, what does all of this have to do with living in the present moment?  According to Louise Hay’s book, “You Can Heal Your Life”, seizures are about “[r]running away from the family, from the self, or from life.”  So, at 19, what was going on.  You could say that I was running away from myself or from life.  I didn’t know how to be me.  It should be one of the simplest things to do, but I had forgotten how.  I would look at other people’s lives and could imagine myself in their place.  I wasn’t living my life; I was moving through the motions.  I would go to work and school.  Hang out with friends.  And repeat.  I would look forward to the day when things would change, but they didn’t start to change until I did.

Now I mentioned earlier that the medication has caused me to have a couple of grand mal seizures if I forget to take my medication.  I can look at these times and the memory loss drives me crazy because I lose a few moments before, and my complete memory doesn’t come back until I have slept.  The connections in my brain reform while I sleep, but what about the between time.  I exist.  I typically remember my name but holding conversations and answering questions is challenging.  My memory exists in snapshots.  I have one memory and I have another one two hours later.  I will never be able to fill in all the pieces.  What I have come to realize is that while it drives me crazy to not have all the pieces, I am better off.  When I have had a seizure, it forces me to live in the moment.  Now I wouldn’t say that I purposely forget to my medication so that I can live in the moment.  That would be stupid of me.  But in that time frame I am in that moment and only in that moment.  There is no past and there is no future.  There is only now.  That moment teaches me so much about how to live life. 

We manifest the life that we want when we can act from the present; when we have released our past and are not constantly looking to the future.  That is what having seizures have taught me.  How are you doing at living in the present moment?  Is there something that happens that forces you to be in the moment?  Remember we are all a work in progress.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.

I Don’t Need Your Help!

As a society we are taught that you should be able to do it all yourself.  If you can’t do it yourself, then you are a failure.  But here’s the thing, none of us can do it all ourselves. 

Everyone needs help every now and then, sometimes even more than we realize. What is wrong with us asking for help?  It goes against everything that we are taught.  We are taught that we should be self-sufficient.  We should be able to do it all, especially as women.  We are taught that we can have a full-time job and a family without help from anyone.  That isn’t true.  We all need to be supported, especially when we are making drastic changes.

Most of my life I have felt that it was unacceptable to ask for help.  I needed to be able to take care of it all myself in order to be successful.  All of life’s answers could be found in a book, or if you tapped way down inside yourself, you could find the answer.  While that may be true to a certain extent, I also found that everyone experiences life through a different lens, and that alternative lens can be extremely useful in helping you to move forward.  It may be that you work with a teacher who can help you to learn a new skill that will take you to new places.  It could be working with a coach or therapist to guide you on your journey through these dark places to a place where the world seems lighter.  I have tried both approaches and you know what?  I was able to move quicker when I asked for help.  Whether it was a teacher or a coach, they were able to see things from a perspective that no matter how hard I tried I wasn’t in that place.  It also provided me with someone that I was accountable to.  I had to demonstrate to someone that I had done the work.  I couldn’t keep kicking the can down the road because something more important came up.  I was truly able to work on myself in a more efficient manner.

We are all a work in progress.  There is never going to be a moment where you are “cured”, but there is a moment that you accept your humanness and no longer let those fears hold you back.  You can ask for help and know that you are doing the best you can.  And you know what?  Everything will be ok.  The world isn’t going to cave in on you because you can’t do everything that you would like.  You can only do what is important to you. 

Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.  How can I help you to make a change?

Shadows and Dreams


Happy Independence Day weekend here in the United States!  It seems like there has been a lot going on in the physical world and the energetic world.  Plus, here in Maine it finally started to feel like summer.

We are amid the eclipse portal.  The second eclipse is on July 16.  Everything is energetically heightened right now.  I don’t know about you, but all my shadow triggers are rising to the surface.  I have had to spend time energetically cutting cords to my past and releasing my fears.

We are halfway though the year.  It is time for a midpoint review.  It is an opportunity to look at things with a new perspective.  Where are you in relation to you dreams?  As I have previously mentioned, my year began with a bang.  The structure that I have spent the last 15 years building detonated around me.  It came crashing to the ground with a giant thud.  I lost my job and spent several days thinking about my next chapter.  What did I want to be in my new beginning?  I had a clean slate.  I could do anything I wanted.  I spent some time looking at new careers, but nothing sparked my interest, like a Facebook Live featuring Colette Baron-Reid and Crystal Andrus Morrisette.  I had also been taking classes to raise my consciousness with Marisa Moris over the last year.  I soon decided there was never going to be a better time to chase a new dream.  I got my Reiki Master training with Elemental Energies with Chris Ann & Jeff and laid the groundwork.  I set up a new business.  I built my website and on April 30, I officially launched my business.  It hasn’t been easy, and I am clearing triggers constantly, but when I’m doing sessions with people it doesn’t feel like work.  I am on my path,

What has been coming to the surface for you?  What are your dreams?  Are you living them?  Let me help you to create your dream life.  Do you want to know more, click here to book a discovery session or an appointment.  How can I help you to claim your dreams?

What Am I Feeling?

Have you felt all the crazy energy lately?    It is not getting easier any time soon.  The eclipses are coming in July (One is on July 2 and the other on July 16).  Eclipses are a time to re-examine your life, with a nudge or even a push.  Maybe a shove.

2019 has been all about examining the past and moving forward.  We are being pushed to look at things differently.  You can see it all around you including in our political system.  The reality around you is shifting.  You can’t go back to what was because that reality doesn’t exist anymore.

My previous reality completely altered in January with the loss of my job.  I have been forced to examine every belief about myself and those around me.  What does it mean to not have a 9 to 5 job?  What has been holding me back from living the life of my dreams?  How have I contributed to my current life? 

I go for a walk every morning to help clear myself and this past week have had so much trouble staying present and grounded in my body.  I have been walking around barefoot to stay grounded.  Luckily, I haven’t stepped in anything gross like dog pee.  Last summer I had the same problem.  I sat under a tree for hours and dug my feet into the dirt during the eclipses.  I have a feeling you may see me doing that again if you drive by my house.

When you are experiencing these intense energies, you must do whatever you can to stay grounded and protected.  What are you doing to help you?  Make sure that you take time for yourself.  Stay grounded, protected and move forward.  Do you need help?  Click here to book an appointment.

My Body Is Talking to Me?

Everything that happens in life, good or bad, reflects our inner life.  What does that mean?  We create our own reality.  Our body and our world are mirrors of what we feel and experience.  If we pay attention to the mirrors, we can change our life.

Let’s say you have gout; it could be a sign of unresolved anger.  Vision problems can be an inability to see what is in front of you.  Back problems could be a lack of support.  All ailments have a meaning.  Louise Hay’s book “You Can Heal Your Life” is a great starting point.  It may not mean to you what it means to someone else.  That’s ok.  We can all interpret things in different ways.  Maybe you are triggered by what someone says to you on a regular basis.  All of these are clues.  If you follow the clues, you could end up with a new life.  If you don’t follow the clues, they don’t go away, they just get louder.

In my own story, I have been following the clues for a while now, but they don’t heal overnight.  My eyesight is terrible.  I can’t see what is right in front of my face without my glasses or contact lenses.  In 5th grade, when I first got glasses, you could say I was naïve.  I believed that friendships would last forever, and people wouldn’t hurt you.  It took another year before I started to see.  I had always assumed that when school started, I would walk together with my friends, as we had the previous year.  One of my friends began to play mind games with me.  I couldn’t get an answer as to what time we would meet, or maybe she would walk with someone else.  I have always liked to have a plan and school was starting in a couple of days.  I told her my plan and figured that I would still walk to school with my other friend.  That night, I found out that wasn’t happening either.  I wound up walking by myself, but she knew my plan.  We would meet at the traffic light, with her walking either ahead of me or behind me.  She would talk with several girls loud enough so I could hear what they were saying about me.  This practice was repeated on the way home from school.  Once home I would cry to my mom and do it all over again the next day.  This happened for two and a half months.  I finally snapped.  I hit her with a binder and took off running.  I told my mom when I got home, but it was different this time.  Her mother called.  I was to blame.  Her daughter would never do anything like that.  By the time I went to bed that night I had also lost my other friend.  I didn’t ever want to be hurt like that again, so I hid.  I didn’t just hide for a day.  I hid for years.  I didn’t feel like engaging with the world until I was in 8th grade.  My vision continued to get worse.  I couldn’t see all the people who I could be friends with.  I could only see the potential hurt. 

Today I still have terrible vision and wear contact lenses, but my prescription has stabilized.  I still run through what don’t I see.  I have some ideas, but that is for another time.  I am a work in progress and always will be.  My body and mirror have other lessons to teach me.  Is there something that you can’t see?  What is your body trying to tell you?  When did you notice a problem in your life?  Follow the clues.  You can either be your own detective or I can help you.  Click here to book an appointment.

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